The following are my thoughts on what it means to find authenticity in personal and professional growth and why I think it matters.

Can a Circle Fit into a Square Peg?

If I were to ask my 3-year-old daughter this question, she’d look at me like I was a very silly bird… probably even say, “Silly daddy,” shake her head, and say “noooo.” Yet, I used to bend over backward trying to please everyone. Offering discounts to clients, hanging out with people I didn’t like hoping they’d let me into their circles (of other people I wouldn’t like), and working at a job I thought would make my parents proud. Spoiler alert: they didn’t care and were more interested in me being a good parent.

What does it mean to have authenticity in personal and professional growth?

Why do we often try to please others instead of being our true selves? Social conditioning? Back when we lived in tribes, being different could get you ostracized and abandoned, which meant death. Social approval was literally a life-or-death decision. Fit in or die.

Today, you can be anyone. You can find your unique version of you and realize you’re not alone in your quirks. Yet, some of us still prefer the calm, safe environment of square pegs for our circle personalities.

The Client Who Didn’t Fit In

I had a client once, a very successful entrepreneur who felt out of place with his in-laws. He thought he had to be the good son-in-law—quiet, respectful, hardworking, and wealthy—for them to accept him. He carried this programming for years.

When he wasn’t successful, he felt unaccepted. When he did become successful, nothing changed. When he lost it all, their love for him didn’t change. What’s the big deal? They accepted him all along. His head was messing with him.

It took a few sessions for him to realize that his belief in needing to earn their love was what made him feel unworthy. Once he understood that he didn’t have to chase their love, he could just accept it. He cried, laughed, then cried some more.

The Breakthrough

When he accepted their love, other areas of his life flourished. Especially his professional life, which saw a massive upswing. He stopped wasting energy chasing everyone and started working only with people he really wanted to. Growth was slower, but he was happier and more consistent. Since then, it’s been all forward momentum.

What’s the Moral of the Story?

Listen to your kids; sometimes they’re smarter than you.

That and… be you. You’re more than good enough as you are right now. You can always be better, but it starts with accepting yourself first.

So good you didn’t even need a coaching session to get that! Free gift, anyone?

At SelfEmpowery, we work with people who are interested in personal and professional growth. First, we figure out what that means to you. Once you have that clear, let’s align it to your heart, mind, and soul and ensure that you flow toward what you want… and allow what you want to flow back to you. Easy does it.

Schedule a session today and let’s find out how best we can support you.

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For more ways to discover authenticity in personal and professional growth, read this.